Episode Transcript
[00:00:04] You're listening to the Poist Powerhouse podcast. My name is Doctor Sita Hood, and I'm obsessed with empowering women like you with practical life strategies to live authentically without compromising your wellness. I used to be caught up in the hustle hard mentality until I learned that my quirky little traits I thought weren't that important, actually turned out to be the secret sauce. I needed to step boldly into my purpose and create impact, not only in my life, but so many amazing women around me. Organizing your schedule, launching impactful programs, redefining leadership without code switching or compromise, and stepping boldly into your God given assignment are all topics we'll discuss here. Think of this podcast as that Sunday brunch with your girls that feels so therapeutic you can't wait to get to it. But let's clarify. This is not a substitute for a relationship with a licensed therapist. All right, grab your notebook and your coffee or your tea. We don't discriminate over here, and let's start the show.
[00:01:22] Welcome back for another episode of the Poise Powerhouse podcast. My name is Doctor Sita Hood, vision architect and licensed therapist. What's in your mug today? What's in my mug or what was in my mug is the roasted hazelnut coffee from Nespresso. Again, not a latte today, just coffee. And yes, I'm still in my iced coffee era. Okay, mind your business. I'll switch to hot coffee when I'm ready. Honey, around this time of year, we always heard, finish the year strong. And let me be one to say, I do agree with this, but at the same time, like, be a little bit realistic. Okay, so let me clarify that finishing the year strong could mean a few different things. And you know, we love us some definitions over here. Okay?
[00:02:22] And in this case of finishing the year strong, this definition certainly does matter. Strong means having the power to move heavy weights or perform other physically demanding tasks, but it also means able to withstand great force or pressure. And it means firmly held or established. So, with all of these definitions in mind, if you need to finish the year strong by resting or by being held firmly or established in your season, there is absolutely no shame in doing just that. But also, if finishing the year strong for you means moving forward with efficiency and power, you do that. Okay. The beauty of life is you get to choose. You show up however you need to show up. That is in alignment with God's will for your life and with what you need to keep making progress. Now, speaking of progress, I've never done a roundup episode. But as we head into quarter three, I thought it would be a little bit fun to do some highlights of past episodes to encourage you as you finish out the year, because you know how you kind of listen to an episode and sometimes you're listening while you're doing other things and you are listening, but a tad bit distracted, you know, and you miss a pretty powerful part of the episode and you're like, oh, I'm gonna go back to that. But you never really go back to it. Don't worry. I got you in this roundup episode. And since we're talking about progress, what better way to kick off this roundup episode than to talk about episode 86, how to be unstoppable. So the very first thing you need to finish the year strong is to learn how to be unstoppable. And this episode is not just me hyping you up, although I'm really going to hype you up. You know, I'm your girl, right? I'm always going to hype you up. Okay. But it's not just me hyping you up without any real basis. But the truth is, in a microwave generation, aka, we're used to instant access to what we want. So in a microwave generation, some folks.
[00:04:51] Some folks don't like to work hard, okay. They don't like to work hard. You like to avoid work and get other people to do it. That's kind of one of the phrases, get somebody else to do it.
[00:05:04] Okay. And the truth is, you uncover the secret sauce when you are willing to put in the hard work. And an even bigger truth is, becoming unstoppable is a choice. I don't want to give too much away. So the episode is going to definitely be linked in the show notes. But check out this sneak peek right here. We go to the Hunger Games. Katniss, they find themselves in situations that cause them to develop that grit where they have to be unstoppable. When Katniss was selected, she wasn't even selected. She volunteered so that her sister wouldn't die because she knew her sister didn't really have a fighting chance. And when she went in there, she's like, I don't know how to hunt. I don't know how to do this. I can't be as great as all these people that have all these training. And the guy that was selected from her district, he was a baker's son. He's like, I don't know how to fight. She was like, throw that big old heavy ball over there and show them what you're working with, because you have enough skill to make it to the next leg of this journey. And that's what he did. And that's what I'm telling you.
[00:06:18] You have enough skill to make it to the next leg of this journey. The second thing you need to do is to release performative self acceptance. You must learn to love yourself unconditionally.
[00:06:33] You have to learn to accept yourself the way that you are, because God intended for you to be this way. And I know. Trust me, I know. I have struggled with certain dynamics of my personality for years until I started to realize, because God started to reveal to me that I was intentionally created this way, the parts of myself that got on my nerves the most. He did that on purpose. He carefully crafted your life experiences to produce your character. And I want to be clear, I am not saying that he wanted you to be abused or anything like that. But the truth is, we live in a fallen world, so sin is unfortunately ever present. And people do horrible things, you know? But even with that, God can use your story. He can use your pain. And this episode is so good in pointing out all the sneaky little ways that we tend to perform in our daily life instead of loving ourselves in spite of our failure. The episode, again is linked in the show notes, but check out this quick sneak peek. So when I ask you, do you like yourself?
[00:07:50] I don't want you to consider the dramatic performance that you give every day when you strut into work and you kill a presentation.
[00:07:59] I don't even want you to consider the Instagram reel of the amazing pasta sauce recipe that you flawlessly executed. Because let's be clear, you did that. Okay, you did that.
[00:08:13] But when I ask you that question, I mean, do you really like you?
[00:08:23] The you that shows up when you're alone and you just get to exist and you just get to be, do you like that person? Because a lot of people's first response is, yeah, of course. But if you think about it, you really like the things that you do. Do you like yourself? And you believe that you're worthy only based on the fact that your productivity is at an all time high? Need a hard confrontation of the truth? And here's why. You cannot be a woman of influence, a woman who changes lives, a woman who genuinely invests in her vision and her future. If you don't accept yourself without the performance, you will not live every day of your life at optimal performance levels. And because of that, you need to know how to love on yourself in the in between phases.
[00:09:21] The next thing you need is to create life systems. You need this episode, okay? If you are struggling with staying on track or getting back on track when things happen, you likely already have some life systems, but they're not necessarily effective. Just like you say, you got boundaries, but then you wondering why nobody honors your boundaries, it's because you're not enforcing them. So they not really effective boundaries, you know? So, you know, I'm gonna tell you the truth and love, okay? I care about you, all right? And I want to see you succeed. I told you I'm rooting for you, so I got to tell you the truth, even when it's hard. But in this episode, I am walking you through a very specific method that I use to set up my life systems and how I evaluate whether something is working or not. Again, this episode will be linked in the show notes, but I want you to check out this sneak peek.
[00:10:25] I wouldn't have been able to recover so loosely if I did not have life strategies and systems. So the value that you get from getting back on track after a trip or a break or a complete collapse of your life, because, let's be honest, life be life in, whether you know it or not, you do have life systems. You have things in place that you use and habits that you fall into regularly that you might not be aware of. So life strategies are your personal life management system. Systems that are built on your personal values and your life principles and your priorities. So we have to start with your. Your values, then your principles and then your priorities and then your systems. So it matters because without life strategies, you feel like you are running from one issue to the next. Do you feel like that? Sometimes you feel like, okay, this happened, and just when I get my head wrapped around this, boom, here's another shoe drop in, okay, now I'm juggling those two things, and then this one finally settles, and that one, I finally start to kind of figure out a solution, and then, boom, another thing drops in your lap. You feel like there's never enough hours in the day. This is why you need a system. This is why you need life strategies. You need to be able to build on the progress that you're making, and you need to be able to see the progress that you are making. If you want to finish strong this year, you are definitely going to need to upgrade your life with this very specific thing, your emotional intelligence. In this episode, I'm talking about the easiest, stress free way to upgrade your lifestyle. And that, honestly, is by increasing your emotional intelligence and trust. Me. There are so many legit free resources out there that can help you in this area. But in this particular episode, I give you four ways to actually use emotional intelligence in your daily life to help you upgrade everything from your relationships to your client experience. The episode is linked below, but check out this quick clip if you have great emotional regulation skills, effective communication. And again, the list goes on and on and on. So diving a bit deeper, emotional intelligence is really about these four concepts that I'm going to put somewhere up here. And if you're listening to this episode, don't worry, I'm about to tell you what the four concepts are. It is self awareness, self regulation, social awareness, and managing your relationships. So self awareness, this one is always really funny because if you ask the average person if they're self aware, they're going to be like, yes, girl, I be knowing. I be knowing.
[00:13:20] Therapists can tell, you know, who's maybe actually really self aware versus who's just kind of talking and believes that they're self aware. And so it's always funny when you ask people that question because research shows that 95% of people believe that they're self aware, but in reality, only ten to 15% of people are actually self aware. Processing your emotions helps you to increase your self awareness. That's the reason why it's one of the key components in therapy, because an increase in self awareness awareness changes the dynamics of all your relationships. Then, number four, practicing controlling your impulses. Practicing controlling your impulses regularly. And we're talking about impulses across the board, like not going in for that second piece of chocolatey clear cake from Portillo's just because you have a craving. Uh huh. Yup. Mm hmm.
[00:14:24] Or practicing patience instead of giving into your road rage when that slow driver cuts in front of you and you're already late for work. Yeah.
[00:14:38] Practicing controlling your impulses so that again, you can effectively navigate through your emotions. The next thing you need is a supportive tribe. I will never stop sharing this because I think that we are 1000% deceived if we think we can get far in life without support. We were created for human connection. We're wired that way. Even if we learned to close ourselves off from it, it's part of our natural inclination. So in this episode, I'm giving you a formula to establish high quality friendships. Because, honey, the truth is it's really hard to establish high quality relationships, especially as a grown woman. Episode is linked below, but check out this quick clip. Navigating through this transitional stage is going to be be proactive in establishing new relationships. And I know that that seems counterintuitive, but I promise it's not. It's not. It's not. Because believe it or not, new relationships can enhance your old ones. You gain perspective from new relationships, and we always talk about where to meet new people. The gym, social clubs or interest groups like book club or learning to golf. Or if you love to golf, going golfing, like, whatever you're into, find an interest group for that. And that's how you're probably going to meet people that you have a lot in common with. So not being afraid to establish those new relationships so that you can learn alternative perspectives, work at maintaining long distance relationships in creative ways. Last week, we talked about creative ways to bring technology into your relationship to strengthen the bond. Again, I want to highlight video calls, social media, and don't be afraid to schedule video calls. We good and grown, okay? We got schedules. We got responsibilities. It's okay to schedule in time for your friend. Just because somebody has a jam packed schedule doesn't mean that they don't want to hang out with you. It just requires a little bit more behind it.
[00:16:54] It's time to talk about what I've been loving. Product recommendations, shout outs to family and friends, and overall gratitude. Let's get into it.
[00:17:08] This week. I've been loving journaling in my physical journal again. Okay? I've been loving it. I am a journal lover through and through throughout the year. Okay? But there is something about fall that just brings out my need to touch a physical page, right? Pen to paper to process my emotions. And, I mean, I still use my digital journal year round and the lavish Haven app for managing my emotions on the go. But it's just journaling physically is just like part of the season for me. If you enjoyed today's episode, share the love, share with your mama, share with your auntie, share it with your best friend, then head on over to Apple Podcast and leave us a five star review. Reviews help the podcast to grow. Well, that's all I have for you this week. I'll see you on these social media sheets. Bye.
